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| Piecing Together a Life |
| Changed Lives - May 2009 |
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| It is hard to believe that the smiling woman, dressed in cap and gown standing among a crowd of well-wishers was just a year ago a defiant, unhappy, and very ill woman who had just walked out of one more detoxification program... |
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It is hard to believe that the smiling woman, dressed in cap and gown standing among a crowd of well-wishers, was just a year ago a defiant, unhappy, and extremely ill person who had walked out of one more detoxification program in a long list of failed attempts to save her life.
Raised in Santa Barbara, California, Tina was an intelligent student and loved sports. Partying after sports activities provided a chance for Tina to fit in. An enthusiastic risk-taker, she overcame severe anxiety with her attitude of “anything goes.”
After moving to New Mexico with her family, Tina married at age 18. Soon her husband’s explosive temper and alcohol use caused Tina to regret the marriage. But with a baby on the way, no education beyond high school, and no work experience, Tina stayed where she was. However, his abusive behaviors escalated, and Tina divorced him.
Eventually, Tina fell in love and married again. He was a loving husband and a good father, and life seemed to be smoother. But, with two young sons to care for, financial worries, and other stresses, Tina’s life was even harder to manage. Tina recalls one afternoon, while baking cupcakes, she was nearly in tears over all the things that were going wrong. Opening a cupboard, she saw a bottle of vodka and thought that a drink would be just the perfect way to soothe her frayed nerves. Tina luxuriated in the soothing effect the alcohol had. That was not to be her last drink for a very long time.
Drinking was becoming increasingly important, yet Tina felt she was still “in control.” However, when Tina’s mother died suddenly, her world fell apart. The pain of her loss was unbearable, and there were not many sober days for Tina after that.
Tina began to hide her drinking, distancing herself from her family in defiance of their concern over her drinking, and found friends that she could feel comfortable with. Alcohol eased her anxiety but not enough. Tina’s life was starting to crumble- divorce, and then her sons went to live with her ex-husband, jobs were harder to find, and the sheer amount of alcohol she drank took a serious toll on her health. In 2002, Tina fell ill. A cold turned into bacterial pneumonia, and the doctors warned her family that she might not survive. Tina was in a coma over three weeks.
“I was so arrogant,” Tina remembers. “ I really thought I could handle my drinking.”
Soon she was sick again. Her family grew frantic for her to quit drinking. Finally, the fact that she could die soon began to sink in, but Tina was still not 100% convinced that she needed to stop drinking. This attitude began a cycle of homelessness, hospital visits, family bailouts, and several recovery programs, but none that she was able to complete.
Tina managed sobriety for an extended time in 2007, but her second ex husband (with whom she had stayed close) died suddenly, and this shock toppled her back into a binge of drinking. Tina recounts, “ Drinking was taking me places I had never been before. I was terrified of being homeless, but I knew I had disappointed my family so often they could not keep rescuing me.” When her caseworker once expressed, “ Tina, do you want to live, or do you want to die?” she had no answer to give.
Tina smiles as she recalls when she was told of a new Christian program for women.
“I literally groaned at the thought of another program. I was programmed out. But my children meant the world to me. I had to get myself back on track for them .” Soon she was talking with Suzanne Teasley, Assistant Director of Women’s Programs with the Women’s Center of Hope, and entered the New Life Program. After a year of hard work, many tears, countless prayers, much support, and trust in God, Tina is our first graduate from the New Life Program for Women in the Women’s Center of Hope. She is now in her own apartment and looks forward to each day with the Lord. “Jesus feeds my soul- not the bottle,” Tina joyfully tells all who will listen. “I have been restored to my family. After over a year of no contact with my son Clint he called unexpectedly and said, ‘I just called to put some pep in your step and tell you that I am proud of your progress.’ I cannot believe how good I feel now. I go to sleep at night with peace in my heart. I wake up happy and thanking the Lord for his gift of life- a transformed life.”
This first year of the ARM Women’s Center of Hope has been one of great growth through much prayer, God’s help, hard work by the staff and volunteers, and financial support from donors like you. We thank you, our donor family, for standing by us now and in the future- answering the calls for help from the homeless women on our streets. |
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